There were no referrals for October. How cruel can this wait get. Especially for those who had been waiting fourteen plus months. The month as the hardest month ever to get through. Even though we all have different log-in dates, we all wait together. Waiting to herald in the newest bundles of joy and waiting to see if we are moving ahead any faster in line. Referrals have typically been going out during the last two weeks of each month, but there's nothing "typical" about this wait. October came and went and we in the adoption community were on edge. So many lives wrapped up in the events to unfold. Rumors fly. Hopes dangle atop a tedious roller-coaster. November 1st was sweet relief for us all. The CCAA finally gave news and agencies began confirming - Referrals were released! I feel like a proud sister now. Our newfound friends here in our hometown now are parents to a beautiful little girl. They were logged-in with the CCAA August 16th, 2005. They hold in their hearts a ten-month old from Guangdong province. They await travel plans. This joyful realisation brings anticipation for all of us in my group logged in September 9th, 2005: Are we next?
It's a month to begin planning for the holidays. A month of reflecting on our blessings. I'm meeting so many wonderful people this side of China, I can only hope for more as we meet face-to-face in such a culture-full country. I have grown to a newer maturity. Though I can't begin to imagine what it will be like for us to finally receive our referral, it seems like a far-off dream now.....stretching farther and farther away, I'm trying to visualize it. How will it feel to finally see her face? Maybe we're next. We've hopped back on the roller-coaster ride for yet another month of ups and downs. We will either set ourselves up to be sorely dissappointed if we don't make it, or we will be swept away in joyful surprise if God intervines, OR.....we will resign ourselves to December. I just so wanted to see my baby's face before Christmas.